Burger King’s ‘deluxe’ burger menu is centered around their signature Whopper. I was surprised to learn that McDonald’s has a comparatively healthy (and I use that term loosely) burger menu with no sandwiches even approaching 1000 calories. Burger King looked at that philosophy and must have said “hold my beer”. The numbers climb well beyond that, let’s check ’em out.

I usually do these comparisons in least-to-greatest calorie order, but this time we’ll jump right to the classic Whopper. For some reason, what you see here is exactly what is on their online menu. The Whopper has no cheese, but the Triple Whopper does, etc. Simply put, you can get a Whopper with one, two, or three beef patties – and with or without cheese. All Whoppers come with ketchup, mayonnaise, chopped lettuce, sliced onion, and pickles on a sesame seed bun. If you go with the Triple Whopper (and why would you do that?), it’s gonna be nearly twice the calories as the original. I was trying to figure out why burgers with so many veggies have so many calories. Instead of mustard, every Whopper comes with mayonnaise, which is your answer right there. Add some cheese, and that’s how you get to 1000 calories in one sandwich.

Let’s circle back to the least caloric option on this list and look at the Impossible Whopper. No meat here, the patty is “made from plants”… and a bunch of chemicals I’m sure. I don’t really understand the Impossible Whopper except if you strictly do not wish to consume meat. It’s not vegan, as it’s made with all the other burgers, and you’re not really going to save a whole lot of calories.

There are two more burgers on the list, and both give you a big chunk of your daily calories in one sitting. The “Texas” part of the Texas Double Whopper seems to be bacon and jalapenos. I’m not entirely sure, as their website doesn’t list the ingredients, but whatever it is adds over 250 calories. The ruler of these burgers is the aptly named Bacon King. It’s like a Double Whopper, sans all the veggies, add lots of bacon, more mayo, and more cheese. This behemoth clocks in at 1,360 calories, or about two regular whoppers.

The closest comparison to Burger King’s ‘deluxe’ burger menu would probably be Wendy’s. McDonald’s offers much less variety, and none of the super-high calorie options. I’ve peeked ahead and can easily assure: you will not save any calories by getting a Burger King chicken sandwich as an alternative to anything on this list.

Lessons Learned:

You can consider the regular Whopper variations as one, and bring this list from six to four. It’s just more meat or cheese.

If you are trying to cut calories, or be vegan, the Impossible Whopper isn’t going to help you.

Burger King is not afraid to pile on cheese and bacon.

eric’s opinion:

I have to admit, the Texas Double Whopper seems pretty tasty. I’ve never had one, and won’t at 1,150 calories. I’m still surprised that McDonald’s Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese has over 150 calories less than the Double Whopper without cheese.